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(Comment to be added.)
Would you like a Christmas card from me?
If yes, then leave a comment (comments aren't public) with your address, and I will dispatch one to you 🎅
I'll post to anywhere in the world (sorry, extraterrestrial friends), though I can't promise anything will arrive before Christmas because they will probably get sent on Dec 23rd/29th - it's the thought that counts though, right? Also, I'm using the same cards as last year (...and possibly the year before too actually, so apologies if you get the same one again).
( The Day of the Doctor spoilersCollapse )
Relatedly, I watched the episode of The Graham Norton Show with Robbie Williams (with boyfriend Olly Murs), Jimmy Carr, Emma Thompson and David and Matt. (If ever there was two episodes-worth of guests on one show, it was this one.) I forget how much I like Graham Norton's whole style and format, I need to make an effort to watch it regularly not just when it has guests I like. I wish Robbie Williams wouldn't speak though. I love his music, I love him when he performs, he's so charismatic and brilliant and everything. And then he starts talking and I'm like *sigh*, because it's like all the charm evaporates and he's just a bit of an idiot. His Norwegian fan was adorable though, and he and Olly were cute when they performed.
Speaking of cute: DAVID AND MATT DAVID AND MATT DAVID AND MATT. They came out holding hands, and then Matt was all curious about David's hair, and they both liked each others TARDISes, and then the Matt lookalike made David be all *omg wow* while Matt was *omg scared*, and then "Did I sign your arm at Comic Con?!?". And I have so much love for David knowing and explaining, you know, how Doctor Who works to Graham and Jimmy who clearly had no idea.
But also also also, light of my life Emma Thompson was there. How is she so brilliant? And funny, and clever, and charming, and beautiful, and wonderful. I also watched straight after the episode of The Daily Show that she's on because, idk if I've posted about this before (I probably have), but it's so adorable to watch Jon Stewart basically fall in love with her on screen. At the beginning of the interview he's kind of like "meh, lady from some movie about a nanny", and by the end he's "ilu <3_<3". (ETA: You can watch the interview here (depending on which country you're in).)
~incoherent rambling alert~
I hate it when correspondents leave The Daily Show. I know this isn't true, but in my head they all live in one little house together like a family, or The Goodies, or a boyband, or the Top Gear presenters, or a football team, or the cabinet. And when one leaves it's like...that bubble is burst. And I don't like change, and it changes everything. Not irreparably, but still. I miss Ed. I miss Rob (C). And Rob (R). And Wyatt. And Steve. And Nate. And even Olivia a little bit. Though not Josh really, tbh. I digress.
But even with that irrationality and my somewhat tenuous grasp on reality taken into account John Oliver leaving makes me especially sad. Maybe it's because he's British and I'm British, or because he wears glasses and I wear glasses, or because I ship John/Jon like burning...whatever the reason, I'm always so happy to see him on the show. I thought over the summer it might be awful and not work without Jon, but John made it work, and I know he's sort of earnt more now, and that it might have been a bit much for Comedy Central to have an hour and a half of fake news every night, and it's great that HBO have given him this opportunity, and it's amazing how far he's come since being an occasional panellist on Mock The Week over here with a bit part in Green Wing, and I really hope it goes well for him, I do.
Nevertheless...it still makes me very sad that he's leaving.
(Also I just shouldn't have OTPs in this fandom. They never last. ...Except Stephen/Paul of course. That's forever.)
1. This picture that Steven Wishnoff tweeted
2. This win
3. This tweet
4. The aftermath
4. This moment, when it was in HD
5. Getting my university reference so I can apply to be a language assistant in Switzerland.
6. This man and his qualifying for the World Tour Finals
7. This faux pas
8. Office Dance Party
10. These Hollyoaks spoilers
Or mostly just "Sandy later finds Freddie and Joe fighting at the garage". Joe/Freddie OTP.
Obviously I'm biased, but I think I prefer the British system of having shows all starting randomly at different points throughout the year, than the American system of fixed television seasons. I see there are benefits to the US way - you know mostly when things are going to be on for example, rather than half a season of your favourite programme passing before you even notice it's on again - but it means everything is on and starting all at once, which I can't keep track of... Anyway, I've watched a lot of shows lately (this post broadly covers the end of September til now, but excludes things I always watch, like The Daily Show, Colbert Report & soaps and stuff I rewatched like Miranda, Strangers With Candy and The Smoking Room), so here are some brief thoughts (mostly for my own reference tbh, so if at some time in the future I ever think e.g., "Maybe I should give Dads another go?" I will know the answer that is "No, don't.").
New shows that I've watched more than one ep of
Sean Saves the World 9/10
Sean Hayes, light of my life (or "Jack from Will & Grace" to the rest of you), has his own show and I love it but of course I love it because I love anything he touches. I found the first ep a little clunky, tbh, but since then it's been great. And Thomas Lennon is just amazing in it, with his moustache, and his dancing. And I've fallen in love with Echo Kullem. (That said, I may have a slight objection brewing about treatment of female characters, but as we're only 5 eps in and it's still ~establishing/finding its ground, I will let it go for now.)
Slash-wise: Well, Sean is gay obviously, but most of the show so far has been about him connecting with his daughter and not much on his lovelife. He has done a pretty fiery tango with Max though. And [spoiler]I gather Craig Ferguson's character when he turns up will at least have ~history with him[/spoiler].
Brooklyn Nine Nine 8/10
I'm really, really enjoying this so far. Really. It's not amazing, or hysterical, or fabulous. But somehow...comfy, if a sitcom can be that. Doesn't make me rofl much, but it's given me some giggles. I'm not sure I can think of another show on television where I actually like all of the characters - I mean, not all of them are nice, and there's still plenty of conflict, but just to me as a viewer they all have their appeal.
Slash-wise: It has Dean Winters (Ryan O'Reilly from OZ) repeatedly slapping Andy Samberg's arse, what more could you want? Also the Boss Policeman-man (I don't understand ranks) is gay.
We Are Men 1/10
Isn't it great when there's a show where there are four well-established male leading characters who spend the whole time complaining about how awful women are while simultaneously constantly objectifying them, and no female character has more than about 5 lines in the whole ep, and the moral of the ep is marrying a woman ruins your life and only men understand men? And also when show acts like it's trying to be a sitcom, but there are no jokes? ...I hated it. (Kutner from House is in it. Which takes it from a 0/10 to 1/10. But still.) It got cancelled after two eps though, so I watched the second one because...I think lennongirl told me to, and it's nice to be completionist I suppose. Actually the second ep was slightly better in that it had a couple of moments that were vaguely funny, which I will reproduce here so no one else has to actually sit through it:
1. (Character was stuck in bathroom while other characters had sex in adjoining bedroom)
"I heard things no man should hear."
"We all did. I had to tell my daughter it was a coyote eating a cat."
2. (Characters are stuck in closet with a dog outside. Everytime Character of Colour (Kutner from House) tries to escape, the dog gets very vicious.)
"I know what's going on here, [the dog] is racist."
"Dog's can't be racist, they're colour-blind."
"Says the white guy!"
"I'm gonna bust outta here, I just need to get past this furry bigot."
That second one was however ruined for me because later on in the ep they made the dog actually racist and it tried to attack a nice Asian couple.
Slash-wise: despite the anti-women message, not actually very slashy at all. There's a man-kiss in ep two, but neither of them are hot and there's a metaphorical "no homo" after, so not worth your time for that either.
New shows I've only watched one ep of
So, so awful.
I do intend to watch the rest of this, because I enjoyed the first ep a lot. And after Sugar Rush and Merlin I trust I'll like pretty much anything Johnny Capps and Julian Murphy make. I was a bit worried it would be a complete Merlin transplant just in a different setting, which it pretty much is, but I don't know why I was thinking of that as a bad thing. Take a mythology, play with it a bit, get a hot young guy to front it...winning formula.
Slash-wise: It was written by Johnny Capps and Julian Murphy. It's a barrage. Though given it's timeslot you can be 90% sure there won't be much/anything in the region of cannonical gay.
The Psychopath Next Door (pilot) 4/10
First scene with a reference to Zayn from One Direction's hotness won me over, and it has a lot of actresses I like in it. Other than that I found it kind of...dreary and petty for the most part. The only actually intriguing bits were the opening and closing five minutes, the middle 35 were dull and fairly predictable.
Slash-wise: Nothing really. Fem-slash-wise: Definitely potential.
Hello Ladies 5/10
A bit cringey, but it's Stephen Merchant so I'm not sure what else I was expecting. None of the characters are terribly sympathetic...but again, Stephen Merchant, what was I expecting. It was reasonably enjoyable.
Slash-wise: Probably inevitable is Stuart wants to ever have sex, because all women seem to be repelled by him.
The problem with British shows that are an hour long, is that they are actually an hour long. American hour-long shows are actually 40 minutes when you skip the ads, which makes British hour-long shows feel almost like films. My point is, this felt a bit long. And also wasn't as funny as I was expecting, but I don't think it was meant to be as funny as I was expecting because it's meant to be more of an amusing drama rather than a sitcom. Or something. Tbh, it all reminded me a lot of the bit from the Top Gear India Special where they have that garden party to show off how good British things are and it all goes wrong... But an hour long. Despite that, I did enjoy it. I mean, it's David Mitchell and Robert Webb of course it's was watchable. ...Not entirely convinced I'll stick with it though.
Slash-wise: It's Mitchell and Webb. The characters don't really know each other much yet, but we've already had David's character completely change his mind and do the opposite of what he wanted to do and be faced with outrage from his boss, just to do what would make Rob's character happy and seek his approval.
New seasons of old shows
Strictly Come Dancing 8/10
15 couples is too many to start with, especially as I hadn't even heard of most of the "celebs" before hand. My fave so far is Natalie, but that might just be because I'm missing Natalie Lowe and they has same name, there hasn't been anyone to really jump out at me as being someone I actually want to really see win. Rachel Riley is beyond adorable, and Ben is very sweet and goregous - neither of them can even slightly dance though. Big fan of new pros Kevin and Aljaz, and I'm liking Karen so much more this year even though I don't like her partner - respect to anyone who'll just casually eat a banana when they're before the judges. Loathe: Julien MacDonald, Vanessa Feltz, Dave, the show pretending Anton never had a good partner before as if Laila (or Patsy, etc.) never even existed. Love: Claudia and Tess presenting without Bruce, Bruno unironically saying "what I say has to make sense", the ever simmering sexual tension between Brendan and Craig (...okay, that last one may mostly be in my mind). But I don't want to go into too much detail because let's be real, anyone other than monkseal blogging about Strictly is just a waste of everybody's time (...even if you don't like/watch the show, you should read his recaps because they are beyond hilarious).
Slash-wise: Ben kissed Craig. Bruno uses every Len's Lens as an excuse to grope Craig for ten minutes. James delighted in getting his cream all over Craig's face. Ben said he wanted to dance with a male dancer not a female one to challenge stereotypes. James kissed Artem, squealed "Artem kissed a boy!", and ignored that as Artem's from Russia doing that on television might present some problems for him if he ever wants to go home and adopt... Actually, just every second of every show...
The Big Bang Theory 5/10
After seven seasons, I may be tiring tbh. I haven't been enjoying this season half as much as I used to. I find myself feeling increasingly sorry for Amy, relationship with her and Sheldon was funny at first but now it's just getting tedious and a bit sad. The Howard/Raj moments feel pretty forced, and I'm not sure I ship them anymore really. It's inexplicable to me that Raj is the only one without a girl now he can even talk to women, because he's the only good one. Bernadette deserves better than Howard. I don't know if because of all these things I'm finding the show less funny, or if it is additionally less funny. But either way, it's disappointing.
How I Met Your Mother 8/10
Still a bit wary over how they plan to get a whole season's worth of drama out of a weekend (unless they're going to focus six or seven eps on Barney having one last affair with the best man before he ties the knot...please?), but I'm enjoying it a lot so far. I like the mum, I like the lady Marshall's travelling with whose name I don't remember and can't be bothered to look up (Debbie?), and I like that Robin and Barney are getting married because I <3 them together. I don't want it ever to end. But I'm excited for the potential How I Met Your Father spin-off.
Hawaii Five-0 4/10
I love Hawaii Five-0. I love the original. I love the remake. I am a forgiving lover and give a lot of leeway regarding flaws. But this season is really not doing anything for me. Mostly, because all relationship development seems to happen off screen which makes it really hard to get emotionally invested in what's going on. Danno being in a quandary about whether to ask his girlfriend to stay with him rather than take a job on the mainland is hard to care about when we've only seen about three scenes of them together in the years they've been together. (Even Steve/Cathy, which has had much more camera time, made the jump from fuck-buddies to true-love all off screen.) It makes the show hard to follow. Also, I don't like Steve/Cathy. Or Cathy at all really. So the much larger focus they/she are getting isn't appealing. I would attribute that to my slash-fan woman-hating bias, but I actually really enjoyed Steve/Laurie when that was a thing (...I know, no one else in the world did) and was rooting for Steve/Jenna for a while, so it's not just McDanno clouding my judgement. I will keep watching though, because I did love this moment:
Reminded me of this in the original:
Whatever his incarnation, Danno is Five-0's go to guy for dealing with upset babies.
Hollyoaks Later 9/10
Dom! Dom was there! And Tony! Dom and Tony! 20 seconds of Dom's naked ass, then walking naked into Tony's bedroom and Tony saying "today is going to be a good day"! Dom/Tony OTP forever! (Only doesn't get 10/10 because they kind of ruined Dom's character, and I'm not sure the "went a bit crazy in prison"-explanation quite cut it for me.) In addition to that, the stuff with Louis and his amy lady was quite sweet, and it's always nice to see Crash from Tracy Beaker again. Also, I'm not usually a fan of Holly, but the scenes with her and Wes were....difficult to watch, in a good way. I really felt for her.
Old shows that are new to me
I hate when shows start off having quite episode-contained storylines but then drift to focussing only on season-long arcs, like this has done by season 3. I also hate that they got Scottie there again to have tense Harvey-not-coping-with-his-feelings moments in the finale. Harvey/Donna are so made to be it hurts. ...Mike is tiresome. Despite my criticism there, I love this show and I wish I'd started watching it earlier when everyone told me too.
Slash-wise: This is possibly the only show I've ever watched where there is a really well-established slash ship that has thousands of fics and everyone likes and I don't really see the appeal. I think it's because I like Harvey/Donna much more than Harvey/Mike. But anyway, there's plenty of potential there. As well as Harvey/Louis, and actually Harvey/anyone he meets male or female. Mike/Trevor's not unshippable too, and Mike/Louis, Mike/Harold. Fem-slash-wise: Donna/Jessica is fabulous.
White Collar 8/10
I've only watched season 1 so far (marathoned it in a day) and I love it so much. Neal is so perfect and pretty. And Peter is so hypocritical but well-intentioned. And the show has a nice balance (so far) of storylines that are contained in epsiodes, but also longer running arcs. And the end of one episode made me literally gasp, which tbh, I do no often do in response to television shows.
Unter Uns (only the Ringo and Yannick bits) 7/10
Between HO, GTST, AWZ, VL and N(eighbours - which doesn't have a good acronym. Get your act together, Australian soaps!), I thought I had my soap-gay needs covered. Apparently not, so now I'm watching Unter Uns too...it's kind of like Alles was zaehlt, but the bar is the other way around on screen and I have no idea who anyone is. And it's even sillier. Not sure if I'll stick with it yet, but Yannick is perfect and everything I love in a soap-gay, Kira is awesome, Ringo is easy on the eye... Looks promising.
I think that's it... Things I've still got to start/catch up on are series 4 of The Walking Dead, Masters of Sex, Elementary and, idk, any recommendations?
Roger Federer, Greatest Of All Time Tennis Player, generally awesome guy. Today I typo'd at him, and he replieeeeeed.
And he said Stannnnn. And he called Stan a mannnnn.
Or "the man", even, we all know Stan's a man.
And he mentioned Yves, and then Yves retweeted it, and that made me almost as excited as being replied to in the first place.
(And he said Tommy, who I also like a bit.)
Basically, today is the best day ever.
(Unless someone I like dies later on, that would take the shine off the day, but still it would probably be one of my favourite days despite the bereavement. I hope I didn't just jinx anyone though. None of you die, that's an order. You'll be responsible for ruining my special day.)
(He's still doing a Q&A as of now (13:40 GMT...or are we still BST? 13:40 in Britain), if you want to ask him stuff too, btw.) He's stopped now.
ETA: Stan RT'd it too now, hooray! So perfect. Or should I say peRFect?
No, but seriously, as of now, over 0.6% of Roger Federer's tweets are to me.
Person A fancies Person B, but is unsure of Person B's feelings and therefore nervous to make a move. Person A finds Person B asleep. Person A kisses Person B while they're unconscious.
Is this scenario...
a) very romantic?
b) sort of a bit rape-y?
And why is it a staple of German soap gay storylines?
First we had Olli nearly doing it to Christian...
ETA: That's just a LQ cap, Olli doesn't have some horrible skin-disease.
Then Christian nearly doing it to Olli...
Then Roman doing it to Deniz, ending in an accidental headbutt when he woke up...
And Deniz again, this time from Joscha...
There must be some values dissonance here, because I find it a little creepy rather than cute or touching or anything that makes me want to ship but I feel it's never presented in the shows as something I should be finding creepy.
Some thoughts on AWZ lately:
- Constanze?!?!?! ;__;
- How does greasy Maximillian keep getting so many hot ladies? Even when they have ulterior motives, they can't be that desperate surely...
- I'm still hoping for Deniz/Katja, but Can/Katja is actually okay by me.
- I kinda like Deniz/Melanie too, he'd look after her and she'd look out for him. And everyone knows each other's sexualities, so no nasty surprises.
- So much lol at the way they glossed over Ingo coaching the football team.
- Third Jenny is my least favourite Jenny
- Can Isabel just go away already?
- And Nick
- So pleased that origi-Lena is back
- I find Bea is somehow insufferable, Ben was much better with Katja. (But lbh, everyone is better with Katja.)
- More of this please, show:
Today, Christian is annoyed because his reverse psychology "I'll tell him he can shag who he likes, and that'll make him only want to shag me"-trick appears not to have worked and he's worried Olli is already on the phone to his ex. Jessica thinks maybe an open marriage could work out, and Olli will definitely have gone to buy Christian some flowers now (...because Jessica is a girl?). Christian shouts at her then goes back to aggressively packing his lil purple rucksack.
(As a cute little mixed-message mindfuck, the music playing during the packing is the same as the "Chrolli desperately trying to get their ends away"-bits from last Tuesday. Surely you know more than one song, show?)
Christian takes some time out to blow his nose on Olli's dirty shirt. Olli arrives back, and offers him a clean one to use instead. Then he wishes him well on his flight.
Jessica's had enough of this shit and locks them in their room while she leaves for work so there will be no chance of her being bothered by either of their moping for the rest of the day. Oh, and she's kind of hoping that they'll make up too.
Back in their room, Christian is trotting out all the "I was drunk and lonely"-stuff again, but Olli is unsympathetic and so goes looking for Narnia again.
He doesn't have any luck, and can't even find the bedroom door key either, so he gets busy with his cacti (...not in the Tim Brooke-Taylor way). Christian say he didn't want to hurt Olli, Olli say Christian's a coward. Christian concedes, but he still wants to talk to Olli.
Symbolism for Dummies/Germans time: they find the key.
Christian is ready to leave, but Olli is ready to talk. He's still scared because he feels he can't compete with ladies. Christian tries to reassure him with a little knee grab.
Olli's not placated though, and wants all the deets of "Chris"'s triste. Christian reveals she is called "Paula" (so presumably is about 50 years old #britishnamingtrends) and they met in a "pup". Christian doesn't even remember it, and it was just sex and didn't mean anything. (See, this kind of reminds me of the interview there was with Frings and Pizarro just before Frings left Werder, and the interviewer asked if they stayed in touch over the years after they were both playing at Werder, then both at Bayern, then both back at Werder. And Frings said something like "well, we said 'let's keep in touch', but that's what footballers always say, it doesn't mean anything", and Pizarro stared at him like "I meant it".) Anyway, Christian gets out his puppy eyes to try and convince Olli to forgive him.
Olli says he wants to punch him.
He settles for a cuddle.
And a kiss. He declines Christian's offer to strip (...yeah, once was enough).
But Christian ends up clothesless anyway. They have a cute post-coital moment, with Christian being all playful, but then asking Olli to come to England with him, to help keep him on the
straight and narrow gay and narrow. Olli agrees. And then Jessica gets back.
And they have a threesome.
In conclusion: ...Well, I'm pleased they made up, and if thy have a nice couple of weeks strengthening their relationship and working on the trust stuff then that's good, even if it is off screen. But I'm not entirely convinced by how they got from A to B. Oh well.
Today, Olli is planning a trip to Narnia to distract him from his pain caused by Christian screwing a lady.
Christian tries to convince him that him sleeping with a woman meant nothing. Nothing at all. Olli has heard it all before (as have we all) so remains unconvinced, then remembers he has to go and do some modelling for Rebecca (again!) so he leaves to go and do that, telling Christian not to wait up for him.
Christian commiserates with the woman he cheated on Olli with before and the ex-wife of the guy the first woman cheated with after she had finished cheating with Christian, and the baby they are now raising together. Perhaps unsurprisingly, this audience is broadly optimistic about the prospect of couples recovering from infidelity: "Olli loves you, otherwise he hardly would've married you again.", "Trust just needs time to grow back.", etc.
Meanwhile at the "shooting", Olli is
transfixed by imagining what the other model's fingers could do to him a bit distracted.
Rebecca encourages them to get closer together, and Olli relaxes a bit and seems to warm to the guy, but after the shoot declines a drink or more with him. Because Olli is a woman of quality [/Jack McFarland]
Olli arrives home, Christian has waited up and naked because he wants to talk. Olli says it would be better if they don't, and they can chat after they've both had chance to test out their new Open Relationship Agreement. Christian rightfully points out that he never actually agreed, and Olli rightfully points out that when Christian slept with other people he didn't even have the courtesy to discuss it with Olli first. Christian says he's sorry, and he's an idiot
, and he wants a tattoo. Olli just wants to sleep.
Christian reaches for Olli, but pulls his hand back, and has a night of flashbacks of happier times. (Why can't they just get married again, so cute, omg.)
The next morning, and Olli is
putting on his make-up contemplating the toothpaste that you can't get in England which he had bought for Christian when he goes back (...maybe it's just sold under a different name, boys? e.g., "Blend-a-med" is just sold as "Oral-B" over here, and "Odol Med 3" is "AquaFresh" - worth investigating to save having to take up baggage allowance with it if you're flying back). But Christian isn't going back. He's staying, so he can show Olli he loves him and make him trust him again.
Christian tells Jessica everything, who thinks Olli should be thrilled and have brought Christian flowers.
Olli has instead bought himself some cacti, and is pissed off with Christian's insensitivity.
Christian is confused, because he is giving up his dream job for Olli so Olli should be happy. He is of course forgetting that emotionally he's done such a number on Olli lately (and, in fact, since ever) that Olli really is never going to see the good in his gestures any more - only the "how will this lead to you shagging another girl?"-angle. Which is a shame, because Olli used to be such a confident little thing, I hate seeing him a mess.
Even after thinking about it the whole time Olli was in the shower, neither Christian nor Jessica has worked out why Olli isn't happy about it. Olli isn't surprised that people like them wouldn't get it (...I love bitchy Olli), so enlightens them that if Christian gives up his job he'll be unemployed all day with nothing to do except resent Olli and this will drive him into the arms of every passing woman. Or something like that.
Olli goes to work, and Christian has a think and a chat with Jessica and decides he will go back to England. He tells Olli he thinks the Open Marriage Idea will only make everything worse (mate, I said that already yesterday, keep up), but he'll go along with it if Olli needs - Olli can go with other people, but Christian's going to stay faithful and hopes one day Olli will trust him again.
Christian is hopeful.
Olli is...sad/unimpressed/sceptical/still hurting.
In conclusion: After the first bombshell of Christian's stay I thought "there's no way they can come back from all this (...because I had seen spoilers for the second thing), having it all believably resolved so that thy stay together and Christian goes back to England = not possible". And then the whole pond thing happened and I was like "okay, maybe", and now this has happened and I'm back to thinking "it can't work out". But I was wrong last time, so maybe it will. Though I'm even more convinced that this isn't really a healthy relationship for Olli to be in... *sigh*
Also, I was watching some old AWZ yesterday, and aside from all the parallels caused by having Olli and Deniz both as models, the same theme of Roman being able to forgive Deniz for cheating when he thought it was with a guy, but not once he found out it was with Jessica (...different Jessica). It also made me realise that basically all of Chrolli's friends are shared. Olli doesn't have an Annette or a Jenny, Christian doesn't have a Vanessa or a Nina. Jessica and Dana are having to play confidante/soundboard to both at once, and even outside that Andi and so on is close to them both as well. I think it would be nice if they had each had someone for themself.
With wins from Stan, Marco, Robin, Thiemo, Kohli, Flo, Murray, Lleyton and Tomic, all the Davis Cup World Group Play-Offs are shaping up okay, except for the Belgians losing the doubles to the Israelis.
My favourite thing about
today yesterday in tennis though was Marco's cute little press conference after winning. Partly because he's charming and adorable in every language, mostly because I cannot stop LOLing at the way Seve stares at him from about 0:23 to 0:33. He stops, doesn't blink, he doesn't move, and then he goes back to normal. Did he object to something Marco said? (Maybe the lack of self-belief in himself/the rest of the team, or the opposite, too much pressure on Stan?) Was he having a cheeky micro-nap? Was there just a wasp near by and he was paralysed with fear? idk, but it amuses me.
(He does it again later, but wih less glaring at Marco, so less fun.)
Or maybe it's not that fun at all and I'm just overtired...
If you haven't watched the ep from the 10th of September yet, the head over to lennongirl's post for a recap better than I could manage, or watch it here. I was still on too much of a high to work a keyboard (that's my story and I'm sticking to it).
Today, we start with Christian going for Olli's nipples, and them playing the "I'll miss you more", "no, I'll miss you more", "no...", etc, game.
More importantly, Jo seems to be actually naked, not inexplicably wearing pants in bed naked like Thore is.
The moment is interrupted, however, when Christian keeps getting phone calls from his provider. He tells Olli it's his mobile provider, but actually it's his English sex provider. So he pretends he's going for a drink but sneaks off to the bathroom to call them back.
"We hed sex, once. Thet's the end off the stohry."
"Chris" protests that he was drunk and he's "heppily merried" and tells them to "leaf [him] alone"*. To be fair to his English squeeze, how could you sleep with "Chris" only once? You want at least a couple more goes, have sex while riding a horse, give him chance to cheat on you with someone, etc. Especially when you're stuck in England and other guys you meet might only last 53 seconds. I digress. Anyway, "Chris" was not as alone as he thought in the bathroom (that's happened to me too).
Christian tries all the "how long have you been there?", "maybe you misunderstood", soapy tricks to try and get out of it, but Jessica heard it all and is pissed off on Olli's behalf.
(And also looking very pretty today.)
"Ach Gatt," cries "Chris". And reveals to Jessica that the mystery caller was a lady. He protests he was drunk, Jessica rolls her eyes, he says he was lonely, Jessica looks vaguely more sympathetic, he says he can't even remember it, and Jessica pulls her that-old-story face.
Jessica tells Dana, because she's loyal to her partner but thinks they shouldn't tell Olli, because if Dana never found out about Jessica and Dana's ex-husband and Jessica hadn't got pregnant then they would still be happy and together, if he hadn't died. Dana thinks this sounds fairly flimsy, and apparently that Christian can't get pregnant.
She loves standing by that sign, hey. She thinks Olli deserves the truth, and on cue Olli comes in looking for Christian and his drink.
Thirsty Olli decides it will be much quicker to fetch a drink himself, so goes to that, while Christian says "Ach Gatt" again, and goes back to their room to look troubled.
Olli returns, and for maximum drama is immensely considerate and understanding (even for Olli), because he thinks Christian is keeping a secret for Jessica and Dana. It's laid on with a spade, and Olli tells Christian he knows how much Christian hates lying.
Christian makes a brief attempt at telling Olli the truth, but Olli isn't listening because he's too horny. Naturally, Christian is overwhelmed by this and has to sex him.
Post-sexing, Olli blathers a lot about all the fun he wants to have with Christian before Christian has to leave again. Christian isn't really listening, and eventually gets the courage to sit up, to tell Olli he has to tell him something. (And not in an Andrius Pojavis way.) Olli says the last time Christian looked at him like that, he had been with Jessica. Christian stays silent, and waits for Olli to catch up.
Olli angrily gets dressed.
Christian: "I hate myself for this." Olli: "I hate you too." Christian: "The last thing I wanted to do was hurt you, I love you." Olli: "Pfft." [...] Christian: "It meant nothing to me." Olli: "It means something to me." [...] Olli: "Was it even a guy, or was it a girl again?" Christian: *incriminating silence* Olli: "RARGH" *hulksmash* (For Olli a hulksmash anyway, he actually only just knocked something on the floor.)
Olli then adds two and to together about the telephone calls. Then he thinks that's why Christian wants to stay in England because of the gal, and believes it's pretty significant that Christian keeps cheating on him with people who can give him something Olli never can, though Christian protests it means nothing. Olli leaves.
"Scheisse!" shouts "Chris".
Olli has an angsty walk again, but this one isn't as effective because it's sunny out, though the lighting is gorgeous. Christian does his own angsting inside with Dana, wondering why he's such an idiot and keeps fucking the ladies, because he loves Olli. Dana hopes Olli will forgive him, but says she's not sure she would. Olli comes back, and says he doesn't want their marriage to be like this, and Christian is incapable of being faithful.
Olli's plan: What's good for the goose is good for the gander, if Christian's going to sleep around, so will Olli. Open relationship.
Christian is aghast. Quick Olli, sleep with Andi before you come to your senses!
*I apologise to Thore for my overly critical transcription of his English - I'm very glad no one does the same thing to me when I try and speak German (though then again, I don't do that on television to millions of viewers). In fairness, of all the scenes in German soaps where characters speak English that I've seen, Thore's is definitely one of the better ones, because his English is intelligible, largely idiomatic, and he's even managing to act whilst speaking it (looking at you Dr Oliver Say-line-in-English-then-do-the-acting-a
In conclusion: Christian! Why do you do this to him? idgi. I mean, Olli must be a good lay, he worked on a cruise ship. What more could you want? Poor Olli...maybe he's thinking of when he cheated with Jule after Tom cheated on him with Ulli and they just called it quits and got back together? Not sure it's going to work this time, mate: 1) you're an insecure little kitten, 2) Christian is a jealous cheater. An open relationship requires trust, it's not the answer for lack of trust in a non-open relationship.
I am going to return to my happy place by watching Tuesday's ep.
Also, I know this is three days late, but really all of The Daily Show should be like this
Today, we join the boys in the flatshare where Christian is hanging out with mostly-naked Ricardo in the kitchen until the others get back with food.
Andi wants people to go out partying with him, but Christian says he and Olli are busy. And that's more or less the end of Christian and Olli in this ep.
Jessica gets so excited when Dana puts on make-up that she slaps her arse ("pretend" couple, sure). Dana is annoyed that EVERYONE IN THE FLATSHARE IS HAVING SO MUCH SEX AND ONLY THINKS ABOUT SEX and she is JUST FINE on her own without any sex, thank you very much. (Good job Chrolli, making other people feel inadequate...)
(Only staff are allowed in Dana.)
Anyway, Jessica convinces Dana to go out instead of her, so she goes to No Limits. Where she meets Jonas.
Andi is a loyal wingman for Dana, having a drink with Jonas's less hot friend so she can have chance to ~bond with him.
But in the end she decides she isn't ready fo anything, so she goes back to the flat and the Jaws music plays.
We also have the continued efforts of Ansgar's worst wooing ever, culminating in her stamping on the flowers he sent her and him implying she might be a lesbian. But he seems pretty with how things went by the end, so you know, probably he's plotting to murder her. (Ansgar, ilu, take me instead.)
In conclusion, not much Olli and Christian, and I'm losing track of how soap days match up to real days. Has Christian been back two days now or three? I'm confused. (Also, this show needs to have fewer scenes with characters looking at themselves in mirrors.)
Unrelatedly, does anyone know anywhere where I can download episodes of Bob de Boumaa (i.e., the Swiss German dub of Bob the Builder/Bob der Baumeister)?
I must confess I fell asleep after Stan lost the first set, having rather written it off. Because it's Stan, and it's Berdych, and while I know Stan can play well (he's not the 9th seed for nothing), I also know that in many ways any slam which he doesn't lose in the first round of is a success, and before this tournie he hadn't won consecutive matches since before Wimbledon so getting to the fourth round here is good and fine and brilliant. But to wake up and find that he won?! There was much squeeage, negl.
And then I read about the crowd shouting "We want Federer" at him, and had to talk myself out of flying to New York to sort these morons out. Eventually calmed myself down by staring at this pic
Now to face this guy. (Don't worry Muzz, I won't hold it against you if you win...)
Bonus perk: Yves has gone into full on protective mother-hen mode over his boys on Twitter. I <3 him.
And it's a good day for the Swisses in general, Marco and Steph have both done winning in St Remy against the first and second seeds.
(Re: this post's title - full respect to Tommy for beating Federer, and his comeback in general is amazing, and you all know I love anyone with a one-handed backhand, but as a Kohli-fan there is always part of me who thinks "cheaty lie-y tosspot!" everytime I see him, and additionally I'm beginning to find Fed's losses less unexpected and more a little sad (it's the end of an era![/Rachel Greene]). So, you know...I like this upset better.)
Today we pick up where yesterday left off, Olli on the phone to the hospital, looking angsty.
The news from the doctor is really not good, and Olli is so worried that he is even very impolite to someone by completely blanking them. He goes to the hospital and finds Charlie, and Christian's jacket (dun dun duhhh, even the stupidest viewers should now have worked out that Christian is fine, therefore a lot of this ep is an exercise in dramatic irony - thank you, Literature AS Level).
Olli is very sad that his last words to Christian were a fight, and thinks it's his fault Christian got hurt because if he hadn't stormed off then they would have been
having sex together, so nothing bad could have happened. Charlie is tells him to stop being moron, but phrases it slightly more supportively than that.
Olli decides the hospital is not an angsty enough backdrop for his angsting, so he goes for an angstier walk in the rain to find somewhere more suitable to wallow in his angst.
Sadly Emilio ruins this plan and makes Olli be angsty inside his gaudy caravan/restaurant because he doesn't want Olli to be all wet.
A wild Christian appears! And what do you know, he's fine - If somewhat sceptical of the decor in Olli's adopted angst den.
And then an apology for their fight earlier from...Olli??? Hä?
Anyway, it's all resolved now apparently, so they leave and abandon Emilio (he was going to make Olli a special coffee and everything...) and they go off to celebrate their anniversary, by
pissing in a pond together Christian making a symbolic point.
He tells Olli that really the Channel is only water, just like the little pond, and if Olli doesn't miss him when he's on the other side of the pond, the Channel doesn't matter either because Olli knows Christian can always be there if he needs him, ad their love is bigger than any puddle. This is actually very cute, and a nice sign of Christian really understanding why Olli was upset and finding a way to reassure him. I love it when Christian's a sweetie.
Then they do sex.
Afterwards, Olli has to go to work, so he leaves for a shower and then Christian's phone rings. (I forgot to mention in yesterday's recap that there was a scene at the beginning where Christian was on the phone to someone English and told them not to call him because he was in Germany (those overseas call charges can be a bitch), today they have phoned back again...)
"I tolt you nat to coll me, OK?"
In conclusion, d'awwwww. Sometimes (most of the time, negl) I think Olli deserves better than Christian, but then Mr Mann comes up with something as romantic and sweet as this and I <3 him so much. (But then the drama-y bit at the end kind of ruined it a bit.)
Be still my beating heart, Christian is back! Chrolli is together! Everything is in its place, and all is right with the world...
Christian arrived back by doing a sexy/narmy striptease for Olli, though first he surprised him in the dark...
I'm not sure if my boyfriend had been grabbed and beaten up in a darkened room before, I would risk using grabbing-in-a-darkened-room as an opener to sexy roleplay. Especially not as a surprise when said boyfriend didn't even know I was in the country. But maybe that's why Olli married Christian, not me, because he was definitely on board.
D'aww, aren't they beautiful?
Also back: Christian's nipples. They were very happy to be there.
...And then it went a little bit to shit. First we had the classic Christian deciding what he wants without really even asking Olli and then getting quite belligerent when Olli is upset. Olli is melodramatic. Christian is dismissive. Lots of Olli being all "I miss you so much when your away that my heart literally burst once and so I had to go and see your cardiologist from your myocarditis but that just reminded me of you more and it hurts Christian, ohhh it hurts." and Christian being all "Well, yeah, I miss you too mate, but horses! Jobs!
English girls!". Christian raises the valid point that Olli could just move to England with him. Olli raises the valid point that signing up to spend another year abroad on your own without consulting your husband is bad form. Neither of them raise the valid point that you can fly from Düsseldorf to London in less than an hour, it's not like his job is in Melbourne or Honolulu or the ISS. I am going to raise the valid point that we've seen this argument a hundred times before. And I mean, seriously, Christian just this minute got back, and the show won't even give us a full episode of happy Chrolli? There is three weeks to do drama, they could've just let us bask in the happiness for a moment.
See, not hard. (Or is it time for a truncheon joke?)
Then Christian went to see Dana and decided he'd been a bit unreasonable. But on his way home to presumably try and resolve things, he suddenly needed to rearrange his sock, so he threw his jacket on the ground in front of him while he adjusted it.
Unfortunately, someone then tries to nick it. (Christian has been spending too long in England, here you can throw anything on the ground quite safely without fear of theft. ...That's not true, but IME there is at least less likely to be dog poo on the ground in England.)
Christian chased after the robber, and slipped a little bit on the stairs, and then Olli got a call from the hospital saying Christian has critical internal injuries.
In conclusion, if after six months of waiting all we get was that, Olli should stick with his faux-beau Ricardo...
The Behind The Scenes video on the other hand, very very pleasing.
How can you compete with this level of perfection?
Hey Ferru, I'm sure you're very busy right now, being awesome and preparing yourself for the final and everything. I couldn't possibly ask you to take time out of your day to affirm my OTP, that would be too much.
Well, okay, I mean if you insist...
"¿Con qué jugadores tienes mejor relación?"
"Pues me llevo muy bien con
Albert Montañes, con Rafael Nadal, cuando estaba Juan Carlos Ferrero."
Listing him last so people wouldn't suspect~, I love it when you boys are subtle.
Ty David, good luck tomorrow.